I have said before that my husband thinks I have money somewhere. Well, this morning, he is breaking into his money jar to get money for gas. He then comes back to the bedroom and says
DH: "unlike you,, when I say I am broke, I am broke. I don't have a card that I can still use to buy things."
Me: "if I don't have money in the bank to cover the card, than I can't use it"/
DH: "You and (son) have been using the card like crazy this week".
URGGHHHH!!! Yes, son used the card twice, but each time, I transferred the money from his checking account to mine. He was waiting for his own debit card to arrive. And yes, I may have bought a few things last night at the GROCERY STORE, but come the first, I will be even shorter!(no pun intended since I am only 4'7" tall! LOL). I hate having to find money for my own spending, much less for someone elses!
It just irks me that he expects me to give him money! He works...granted last weeks check was a day short, but he still made money and to be completely broke by Wednesday? I think he needs better money management skills...I am not just going to hand money over to him! Plus his brother(read leech) rides with him to work everyday and I doubt that leech is giving him any money! So why should I?
Please understand...if he wasn't working and being a house husband, I have no trouble supporting him. But when he is working and can't manage his money, I feel like I would be doing him no favors by handing over money to him(if I even had it!)
URGGGG....so I am frustrated this morning. I sent DH a text telling him that son used card and I transferred money and since he has started working, I haven't given him any money. Haven't heard back for DH yet. Don't expect that I will. He is supposed to camp close to work this evening, so he won't be home. I plan on taking daughter to a movie...sure that will go over well with him! I told daughter last weekend that I would take her tonight. Oh well.
ADDITION: Last night I made him dinner...nothing great, just some hamburger helper. I knew he probably hadn't eaten all day. But I didn't eat. I don't eat hamburger and I really wasn't hungry. He kept asking me what I ate today. I didn't eat out yesterday. But he kept asking me, like I was lying to him! I ate a frozen meal that I have in the freezer at work and a bagel that I have in the fridge at work! But he was so sure that I had spent money, but yet I won't give him any! Double URGGGGG!!!!
URGGGGG!!!!!
May 28th, 2009 at 01:59 pm
May 28th, 2009 at 02:37 pm 1243521425
I'd skip the movie unless your daughter is paying since it sounds like you don't have the money for that luxury.
May 28th, 2009 at 02:54 pm 1243522482
May 28th, 2009 at 03:11 pm 1243523469
On a more fundamental level, although I personally believe in separate financing as a viable option, I also admit there is a potential downside, and that downside is basically what you are describing: That there it could lead to lack of transparency. And that could lead to mistrust....
Sadly, the best way to correct this is to show him exactly what your transactions are.
Still, I sympathize with your frustration, and I hope things get better.
May 28th, 2009 at 03:11 pm 1243523471
May 28th, 2009 at 03:25 pm 1243524356
May 28th, 2009 at 04:04 pm 1243526675
May 28th, 2009 at 04:45 pm 1243529145
Just a thought.
May 28th, 2009 at 05:46 pm 1243532783
May 28th, 2009 at 05:53 pm 1243533197
Boomeyers...I don't know that he blames me so much as he expects me to bail him out...to give him money for gas when he runs out, with no accounting necessary.
May 28th, 2009 at 07:38 pm 1243539480
May 28th, 2009 at 08:59 pm 1243544361
May 28th, 2009 at 09:24 pm 1243545891
May 28th, 2009 at 11:07 pm 1243552070
That way, he can look at it when he feels like it, and ignore it when it doesn't. But he can't really say you're trying to hide something, since at least you're trying to make it easier for him to understand your budget....
May 29th, 2009 at 01:32 am 1243560726