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I am devestated(not Financial)

July 25th, 2011 at 04:24 pm

We found out why the investigator was looking for DS. It appears that he had sex with an underage girl. He will be charged sometime this week and will then turn himself in. I am devastated not because he had sex, but that he lied to me and told me he didn't have sex with her. I am terrified that he is turning out just like his father, not able to resist anything.

Now we need to come up with the money for a lawyer. Of course DS will need to pay it since it is his problem. But none of us have money sitting around so I am not sure what he will do. His father is calling the lawyer this morning. He is supposed to let me know how much the lawyer wants. he is 18 years old so he will be treated as an adult. There is something called the close in age law in Georgia. If the two participants are within 4 years of age of each other, than it is treated differently. They were so we will find out how that works when his father talks to the lawyer.

12 Responses to “I am devestated(not Financial)”

  1. ceejay74 Says:
    1311607815

    Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear this. Wishing you the best in trying to help your family deal with everything!

  2. creditcardfree Says:
    1311607927

    ((Hugs)) Obviously not good news. I hope for the best outcome for all involved.

  3. laura Says:
    1311608073


    So sorry to hear - as a parent is difficult when we have to face a poor choice that our child made. Hopefully your son will learn from his mistake and make wiser decisions in the future. He is fortunate to have supportive parents. I would suggest that you get your son into therapy prior to turning himself in - even if it simply an outpatient eval. I would think that such a thing would help him be viewed more favorably in light of his situation. (I've worked with Guardian Ad Litems in Cook County, Chicago - things might be different here than in Georgia), but I'd start getting character references notarized - the word of a clergy who knows your son would be valuable also.

  4. gambler2075 Says:
    1311609106

    Oh wow, sorry to hear about this. How old was the lady involved?

  5. HousingCounselor Says:
    1311611367

    Are you still in Georgia? Check with the laws in your state and google BJ Bernstein and Genarlow Wilson. Your son should be covered under those laws that would make his crime a misdemeanor with no sex offender registration required. She's an attorney in the Atlanta area but she's really pioneered for the state of Georgia to change the laws concerning adults who have sex with minors who are close to adult age. I think she helped pioneer a law to where the closer the minor is to eighteen the less the offense is considered. 16 is the age of "consent" there.
    I hope everything works out with you and your son. It's not ok but I'm sure that it was consensual.

  6. Miz Pat Says:
    1311611794

    This is devastating and you are in my prayers, Dear.

    My sister had something similar happen where her oldest daughter had sex with an underaged boyfriend and got pregnant. It was a horrible thing for the family (and the lawyer explained that in Michigan the daughter could be charged with statuatory rape), but you know, we got a beautiful grandchild out of it, and a wiser oldest niece.

    Take care, dear lady.

  7. Petunia 100 Says:
    1311616359

    Oh Georgia Gal, I am so sorry. Your son is young and made an unwise decision. I hope an attorney can help him.

    Sending positive thoughts for you and your son into the universe.

  8. CB in the City Says:
    1311622903

    I am so sorry. It looks like others have given you good advice. It hope it doesn't turn out to be as bad as it seems.

  9. LuckyRobin Says:
    1311624690

    That's truly awful. Isn't it in the Miranda rights that if you can't afford a lawyer one will be provided by the state?

  10. Petunia 100 Says:
    1311631039

    LuckyRobin, yes, it is everyone's right to have the public defender's office provide legal counsel. Typically, PDs are new lawyers with huge case loads and tiny salaries who understandably leave for better paying jobs as soon as possible.

  11. PNW Mom Says:
    1311638770

    So sorry.....sending prayers and hugs that it will all work out.

  12. Jerry Says:
    1311950414

    Oh, I'm so sorry that this has happened, and I hope that you are able to find a path that leads to a speedy resolution. With the fact that they were close in age, perhaps there is some insurance that it will be prosecuted in a less-aggressive manner. Good wishes for your family...
    Jerry

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