I took my daughter and her 2 friends out to Mexican last night. I knew that the money in my account was allotted to other things, but I did it anyway. Now I am going to have to borrow money from my son. Why do I do that? I tell myself that it is an important day(birthday). I usually hate myself for doing it, but I am helpless to stop myself from doing it. What is wrong with me? I throw my whole budget out of whack by doing stupid things like that. I figured up my cini-mini addiction. I spend $100 per month on these things. That is outrageous! That is my cable bill. I really need to break that addiction. My therapist and I are working on that. But that doesn't help me feel any better right now.
Why do I do the things I do????
July 9th, 2010 at 02:29 pm
July 9th, 2010 at 02:38 pm 1278686311
We've all been there, done that. I was guilty of an un-needed impulse purchase (justifited it by saying 'I'm worth it', but of course it really stemmed from low self esteem comparing myself to other people) and it went back. Can you be a cash-only basis? That would help bring a level of accountability to the spending. We had to do that. First it was: Let's use the credit card because we get lots of points back. The plan was to weekly transfer the spent funds - that didn't last long. Then we stopped using the cards. Then with the debit card, it was: Well, we still will get points on the purchase, just not as many. BUT we still spent from other categories. Cash has been annoying, but it does LIMIT what can be spent. I've adjusted well - and it has also helped mainstream the amount of errands. Good luck! Don't feel too bad about. Try another system to alleviate the problem.
July 9th, 2010 at 02:51 pm 1278687068
And good for you for posting so honestly on your blog. We're all rooting for you!!
http://caloriecount.about.com/calories-burger-king-cini-mini...
July 9th, 2010 at 02:55 pm 1278687312
July 9th, 2010 at 02:59 pm 1278687548
Joan, It was my idea to go out to dinner, not my daughters. They do this birthday thing where you get to wear the big sombrero while they sing happy birthday. It was more me wanting her to experience it.
July 9th, 2010 at 05:25 pm 1278696359
July 9th, 2010 at 05:45 pm 1278697543
And figure out a way to reward your self as you drive by. Maybe an envelope in your car you can put the saved money into. Or bite into a cinnamon roll you made at home and brought with you.
July 9th, 2010 at 06:27 pm 1278700061
Jerry
July 9th, 2010 at 07:36 pm 1278704207
Maybe a way you can break the addiction is to buy cini buns from the grocery store - the big ones, and either buy or make extra icing. Then cut them up into minis. Add up the cost of the ones from the store, and subtract it from the cost of BK's, and put it into a savings fund for something you really want that is frivolous. Or, cut costs even more by making them homemade. Or, tell yourself that if you skip BK x number of times in a week, on Saturday or Sunday, you get to enjoy a big decadent cin roll with tons of icing. Each week make it more difficult to obtain.
July 10th, 2010 at 07:07 am 1278745636
July 10th, 2010 at 11:29 am 1278761375
I do know, while dealing with the stress before we filed BK and even before we closed DH's business, I turned to food. The only thing that made me feel good was being full. And this is a feeling that goes back to childhood - what do you do to stop a baby from crying? Feed it! So feeling full and content is something we've learned from early on. Full and content seem to go together. As a result, I put on 40+ pounds. I'm now working to get the weight off, but it's very difficult.
I now realize that the food was also the thing I could control, and the only thing I could control, so I made sure I had a plentiful amount. Everything else was crumbling around me...food was still there. What a great friend food is...until you realize you have an issue with eating too much!
I think your cini-bun "addiction" is that same kind of issue. This is something you like, you can have, so you do. It's the one thing you can control. $100 a month? Well, yes. It's a lot of cash and would also pay my cable bill. However, I'm confident that you, like me, will be able to get control over the food thing once all the other things fall into place.
The concern I have is that you are taking money from Paul (your son) to pay Peter (your bills) because you chose to go out to eat. And it sounds like you may do that more frequently than once in a while?
Do you give yourself an allowance each week? If you gave yourself $20-$25 a week to spend on whatever you wanted (including kids out to eat, cini-buns, nail polish, etc.), do you think that would keep you from taking money from the bill money? Plus it would lessen the guilt feeling you get after spending. But - you have to make a vow to yourself that you won't spend more than your allowance on these "splurgy" things.
July 11th, 2010 at 01:45 am 1278812748
July 17th, 2010 at 04:50 am 1279342218
My solution has been to learn to cook that food or lightly adjusted healthier version at home, from scratch. Whatever I make will always come out to be more healthy and delicious -- truly fresh, hot - not reheated, no preservatives, and I won't use sub-standard ingredients, or re-use oil, or put a stick of butter into it...
And since it takes more effort to make it, I don't have it as often, it is more special, not consumed thoughtlessly, but savored. And I don't feel deprived since I don't "forbid" myself to have it.
From health point of view:
7g x3= more than the ENTIRE daily recommended amount of saturated fat.
39g x3 = 117 grams of sugar
Oh, but I know it can be hard. My weakness is croissants. Cannot be treated with my home cooking substitution strategy -- unlike everything else, they are just too labor intensive to make at home.
Luckily, I know only one bakery that really makes them well, and they are only up to my standard within half an hour of coming out of the oven -- the people in the bakery know me and always get me a hot one off the rack, but I have to be there at the correct time. So I don't have access to them every day.